Friendship

This whole school year has been filled with loss, rediscovering, and finding that which I did not have. Let me explain; friendship seems to have become a passing thing, something that is not perminant to say the leased, and a possession that can be lost, and found, and re found. Dictionary.com states that a friend is "a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard". Which is true to the very end, but after the affections and personal regard is gone, all you have is someone attached to you who knows you like the back of their hand and could through a wrench in your life. And soon enough, the other definition of friendship, "a person whom one knows, likes, and trusts", is only 1/3 of what is was before. With knowledge the attracting and trust seems to fall away. So is it that when you get to know someone too well you begin to not like them and than not trust them, or is it that the trust falls away and soon with that the attraction is gone? All I know is that there are those friends who think you are so close too you could tell them anything and than the friendship falls apart because of lack of trust, and those that you trust right off the bat and your friendship grows until you don't care about how close you are, your just close.
Oh and than those that say their your friend and talk behind your back about you constantly because they know you so well. I have lots of those. I don't like it. I really liked the definition urban dictionary.com said a back stabber was; "someone who pretends to be your friend; but talks s**t about you to other people". Exactly, so is it inevitable that a close friend who knows you so well will become a back stabber. Seems that way to me.
I am a very trusting person, so it's known that i will be back stabbed sometime in my life, right now I'm thinking it's going to end in high school, but I know that some people don't grow out of the cattiness of high school. I'm looking forward to those times that you can just count on someone backstabbing you instead of thinking its going to happen.
I don't even know what I'm talking about anymore, but that's how I feel. Friendship is not a constant thing, it's a once in a lifetime chance to make a unbreakable connection with someone. The only thing that can destroy it, is trying to fit into a crowd that you probably shouldn't be in if they don't except you already.